Positive Thinking + How I De-Stress

Hey there!

Welcome to another post! I am seriously so so so dang happy you clicked on this post! Over the past three years I have had many people comment on how strong I was…strong in moving from beautiful and easy Petaluma, CA to Reno, Nv to leaving a long and difficult relationship to living by myself for a year to leaving everything I knew and created in Reno to moving with Bryan to hot and happening Las Vegas! There were many times where I would put my head down at night and be like, ” What the fuck am I even doing with my life right now!” or “Who am I” or even ” is this real?” (Quick question: do these thoughts ever stop? I kinda hope not!)

I, mean, seriously! Think back to yourself six months ago…how different your life was and how far you came in just that short amount of time! I’d say it is amazing! (If your life is exactly the same as it was that length of time ago, that is okay as well…I would just consider pushing your boundaries and doors and peak to see what this world may have to offer you.)

Some of the things that really kept me going include:

A. Keeping my eye on the prize! I am a *huge* goal person. Write it down and make notes on how I can get to that goal! I make achievable weekly goals, monthly goals, and I have a large goal that will happen when it happens with steps on getting to that goal! As an example, here are this weeks achievable goals:

  • Take Dop for a walk every day this week — I know this is silly but this is a grand example of what I mean by making achievable goals!
  • Eat clean(er) this week — Don’t be hard on yourself. Moderation is our best fran!
  • Use the Peloton app every single day — This is kinda sorta an open ended goal for me as there are an array of different kinds of workouts and workout lengths. That being said, I am not ready to be super duper hard on myself to following any sort of schedule. Mayyyyyybe next week *shrug*.
  • Read 30 minutes a day — This is a new one and a hard one for me. Putting the world aside while I focus on something that isn’t necessarily my cup of tea. I bought a few different genre books off Amazon to see what my kind of book is. So far so good! I’ll report back what I have a report to give!

B. Remembering that I am laying a foundation for my life. I am more than willing to work hard as hell now, while I am young, so that I can hopefully ca$h out one day and live my best life w Bry on my side.

C. The biggest lesson of them all + the hardest thing for me to change. Hang in there with me while I try to explain this concept! Money. If you accept money with a closed hand, you are unable to accept more money / opportunity. This is the idea of holding on to what you have with a death grip. If you accept money with an open hand and heart, you are able to have money come and go “freely” allowing for opportunity, growth, and more money to come in. I hope this concept makes sense. If you would like more on this, Daddy Dave Ramsey is your dude!

All of those goals bulleted above are things that bring me overall happiness and make me feel gucci (grounded)! But the week prior, I lacked some, if not all, of those things. So in order to get back on track and continue being Happy Madi (not MOODY MADI), I made these my goals because I knew I could check all of these off each day.

Prioritizing *our* happiness and time for ourselves is something that our gender lacks HARD. I mean, generally speaking, we seriously spend majority of our lives for others: kids. I am the friend that is always reminding people to take time for themselves. Make it a habit. Know deep in your soul that it is not selfish, it is actually quite the opposite. Create this habit in your young twenties, if not earlier, and although self – care may look different as the years go on, make sure you never put yourself last all the damn time. Life is too damn short, shawty.

Back to scheduled programming:

Making goals that I can’t complete ultimately doesn’t help me, so with those type of goals, I have to have steps on how / what I can do in order to reach those goals. Some goals that i consider unable to complete could include: financial freedom fast / overnight, loosing a ton of weight before x date, building a multi million dollar business in a year, wanting to find your person this year, etc etc etc.

For me, right now, my BIG goal is feeling good in my skin. This can mean so so so many different things and at the end of the day is more of a mind set than a physical change. Here are the steps that I am continuously working on in order to achieve this goal ( in this season of life):

  • Catching myself with negative self talk — It is important to recognize and change my negative thoughts when I have them.
  • Getting rid of clothes that do not and most likely might never fit. It is important to acknowledge that you may not ever fit in those 00 shorts from freshman year of high school or that body con dress that you wore once your sophomore year in college! It is important to make sure that you don’t negatively talk to yourself when cleaning out your closet
  • Eating clean. I caught myself eating more sweets than I have ever eaten in my life up until last week. Like what is dinner without dessert???? I don’t know!! Just kidding! Moderation is cool + is a win win!
  • Working out! I purchased the Peloton app a little over a month ago and I have not turned back! I think I am going to do a whole post on my Peloton experience in the future…but I love the live and scheduling feature! Plan out your workouts and when you are going to hit the gym!

I’d like to also mention that sharing your goals with your friends or your partners is always an awesome way to hold yourself accountable. When I have a goal I am really trying to check off, like the one above, I always tell my MAMA and Bryan. Between the two of them there are even times I wish it wasn’t my goal they both hold my goals at such a pedestal. “You want this…we gon’ get you there” is the attitude they both naturally have.

Some of the things I have been challenging myself with include:

  • Reading. I am not a reader…or I didn’t think I was. I have challenged myself over the summer to find my kind of book. I have obsessed over this book called Eat, Pray, #FML. I feel like every girl can relate to this book in some way or another. Check this shit out.
  • I picked up this planner that kinda pushes some creativity as well as planning your future and most importantly what steps you are going to take to get there. It is a 3 month planner, so once I use it up I will then report all about it. What worked, what didn’t, etc. Would anyone even want to hear (or read) what I have to say about something like a damn planner?
  • Planning my Peloton! I sit down every Sunday and plan out my whole week, including my workouts for the week. I really love writing down my workouts that I plan on taking that week to hold myself accountable! I have a free resource that I use to jot down those workouts and hang in my home gym!
  • Me time. Me time is SO freaking important to me. Most nights I like to go upstairs about an hour before Bryan to do my ritual. I throw on a podcast (post coming soon!!!!), do my skin care routine, I take baths pretty much every other night, and kinda just spend the one hour doing whatever the heck I want. Obvi if we are watching a movie or enjoying our time together, I’m not like peace out boy scout! Just if we are chilling or Bryan wants to watch a boy show to end the night, THANNNN i’m like peace out boy scout!

So yeah, taking care of ourselves is important AF…but do you know what else is important? Listening to what our bodies are saying and needing. Evaluate yourself. Listen to yourself. Ask yourself how you are doing on the reg. I promise you, sis, you will thank yourself someday!

Until the next post,